Ellis L. Marples

Old is When...

• "OLD" IS WHEN..... Your sweetie says, "Let's go upstairs and make love" and you answer, "Pick one, I can't do both!"

• "OLD" IS WHEN..... Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you're barefoot.

• "OLD" IS WHEN..... A sexy babe catches your fancy and your pacemaker opens the garage door.

• "OLD" IS WHEN..... Going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.

• "OLD" IS WHEN..... You don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to go along.

• "OLD" IS WHEN..... You are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead of by the police.

• "OLD" IS WHEN..... "Getting a little action" means there's no need to take any fiber today.

• "OLD" IS WHEN..... "Getting lucky" means you find your car in the parking lot.

• "OLD" IS WHEN..... An "all-nighter" means not getting up to use the bathroom.